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The damn creepiest commercial Nintendo has ever made reminding everyone that YOU CANNOT BEAT US.

Captain Cletus MacDonald of the Federal Aerospace Farmhand Association (FAFA) settles into his saddle, his trusty six shot laser pistol by his side. Today, he must dogfight with two, maybe three rowdies stirrin' up trouble with the doggies in Delta Sector 7. Sargent Dingus approaches from behind and taps Cletus on the back. "Maybe one day we'll put an end to this gawl-derned galactic warfare", he says. Cletus slips his feet into the stirrups and lights his fuse...

You are part kite, part tin foil, and totally NON HUMAN! Read about what is just about the craziest looking platformer on the Action 52

Let me set the record straight right now, I’ve never really “gotten” porn games. Seriously, why do you need to play, kill, and solve puzzles to earn your wank when you can just get on the internets and snap a few off and just bypass the hassle? It just doesn’t make any sense to me, especially considering that pretty much all “adults only” games are fucking garbage anyways.  Oh hey, speaking of garbage, here’s a game I dug up from the briny bottom of the porn game barrel called Immoral Cumbat. That’s what we call a “Segway” in the “biz”.

You’ve got to admit, it’s got to take balls to release a game based off of Japanese Kabuki Theater to a bunch of Americans who really have no idea what it is. If Crave and Genki thought Kabuki Warriors would usher in an era of hardcore Anime fan boys going gaga for Kabuki Theater, they were wrong, wrong, wrong. Kabuki Warriors is not a lame mockery of the art form as much as it embodies the term “half-assed” to a T. Have you ever wished you could play as a painted-up mime armed with an umbrella, or better, a fat guy in a diaper and pit them against an army of plain gray clones in beekeeper masks? To those who say yes, shame on you. Go sit in the corner.